The first wedding is often planned by everyone except the couple. Parents choose the guest list, relatives weigh in on rituals, and the day rushes past in a blur of photographs. Years later, many couples want a second chance at the same promise, this time on their own terms. That is why vow renewals, once a quiet family ritual in India, are now planned like proper celebrations, from small temple ceremonies to destination weekends with friends and grown-up children.
A report in The Indian Express this week, published on October 29 and updated on October 30, says renewing vows is less about recreating the wedding day and more about marking the marriage built since then. Travel firms now list vow renewals alongside honeymoons as celebration trips.
Why the second vows feel different
Psychologists quoted in the coverage draw a useful distinction. An anniversary marks the passage of time. A vow renewal marks a change in the relationship. Dr Munia Bhattacharya, senior consultant in clinical psychology at Marengo Asia Hospitals in Gurugram, told the newspaper that long marriages can become very efficient partnerships, yet couples can stop paying attention to the relationship itself.
Relationship coach Sidhharrth S Kumaar of NumroVani says the draw is not romance alone, but acceptance. By 10, 15 or 20 years together, couples have seen each other’s habits, fears, strengths and limits. The wording often changes too: couples write specific promises, to listen before getting defensive and to protect time together.
From temples to destination weekends
There is no single format now, and that freedom is part of the point. Some couples choose a private ceremony followed by dinner. Others pick a temple or a place that holds meaning, invite only the people who genuinely matter, and keep the guest list short. Larger celebrations can stretch over two or three days, with dinners and music.
One couple featured in the coverage, Kajal, 38, chose the Triyuginarayan Temple and vows the couple wrote themselves, including a promise to care for their pets together. For Sharadh and Varsha Vajpayee, renewing vows on their 25th anniversary was a chance to reconnect beyond their roles as parents. Celebrity renewals have made the idea more visible: Suriya and Jyotika recently marked 20 years together, Sanjay Dutt and Maanyata Dutt renewed theirs in October 2024 after 16 years, and Sunny Leone and Daniel Weber did the same in the Maldives in November 2024 after 13 years.
What it costs, from Rs 1 lakh to Rs 2 crore
Budgets vary widely, and planners say couples are often more careful with money the second time around. According to Shanu Jain, founder and chief executive of The Wedding Toli India, quoted in the Indian Express coverage, an intimate vow renewal can begin at around Rs 1 lakh to Rs 2 lakh, sometimes less. At the other end, destination celebrations can cost as much as a lavish wedding. Jain cites a Goa event for around 200 to 250 guests, costing close to Rs 1.75 crore, and another elaborate celebration at approximately Rs 2 crore. Guest numbers typically range from 20 to 30 for a small gathering to 150 to 300 for larger ones.
Demand is strongest around the 25th and 50th anniversaries. Tina Bakshi, founder of Lateral Events, told the newspaper that more couples now want to mark these milestones properly, sometimes with professional planning. She puts the split at roughly 70 to 30, with the larger share leaning towards a grand celebration.
How to plan one without losing the meaning
Start with the marriage, not the venue. Talk about what the last few years have taught you, and what you want to promise now.
- Pick a milestone that matters. The 10th, 25th and 50th anniversaries are most common.
- Keep the guest list honest. Invite people who have been part of your story.
- Write vows for today. Specific vows age better than grand ones.
- Choose a place with a memory. A temple or hometown will mean more than a generic venue.
For Priya and Madhav, who spoke to The Indian Express using pseudonyms, the first wedding felt like an event their parents hosted for everyone else. Renewing their vows let them have the simple experience they had always wanted. The first vows look forward to a life not yet lived. The second vows look back at a life already shared, and forward again, with open eyes.
FAQs
What is a vow renewal?
It is a ceremony in which a married couple restates their commitment, usually years after the wedding, often at a milestone anniversary. It is symbolic, not a legal remarriage.
When do most couples renew their vows?
Demand is strongest around the 25th and 50th anniversaries, according to planners, but couples also renew vows at 10 or 20 years, or after a major life change.
How much does a vow renewal cost in India?
Planners quoted this week say an intimate renewal can start at around Rs 1 lakh to Rs 2 lakh, while elaborate destination celebrations can reach Rs 1.75 crore to about Rs 2 crore.
Do you need a large guest list?
No. Small gatherings of 20 to 30 people are common, and many couples keep the list to close family and friends.
Can a vow renewal be religious?
Yes, if the couple wants it. Many choose a temple ceremony, while others prefer a private, non-religious celebration.
